Life, Love, Sex

Sex and Submission

Kylie Ireland and Mark Davis

Sex and Submission

Mya Nicole

Breath Play is Awesome

Actually, I’m calling it breath play because it’s easiest to call it that, but I suppose I’m really talking about blood flow play. Or choking. Squeezing the carotid artery. Whatever you want to call it.

I wrote about it briefly.

Friday I showed up to Adam’s early to help set up for the party. I was on my knees blowing him when he reached for my throat and squeezed tight. I don’t think it was more than 5 seconds before my body fell to the floor.

So. Fucking. Cool.

It’s so addicting. I swear it’s a drug.

Later that night I was playing with someone new when Adam showed him what I like.

Almost instantly I was thrown against the wall and a new hand was pressed against my throat. I squirmed and moaned until I felt the blade of a knife against my skin. Then I remained quite still.

Knife play is awesome too.

*Sigh* I wish I could write something better, but my mind feels so uncreative right now…

Fight or Flight

I had just walked through the door and put my purse down when he snapped his fingers and told me to kneel in front of him.

And that’s when it started- the brutality.

It couldn’t have lasted more than 20 or 30 minutes but it was intense.  His hands and teeth dug into me hard; grabbing my flesh; twisting; pulling; threatening to tear it off.  I tried to fight him.  I cried as I pushed his hands away and tried to squirm away only to be defeated as he grabbed my hair and slapped me again and again.

His hands grabbed my throat and squeezed hard.  And kept squeezing.  My brain started to get fuzzy.  My limbs started to feel like lead.  And then he let go and all went back to normal.

Fuck that was cool, I wanted him to do it again.  A brief thought before his hands covered my mouth and nose making me struggle for breath.

I cried as he got me to beg him to fuck me and then when he made me confess that I liked him in my ass.

And then when he was done I came down from it all, exhausted from the sudden surge of adrenaline and endorphins, with my head in his lap as he stroked my hair.

He purred in my ear, “You’re such a good girl.”

One of the hottest things said to me, ever

Adam: I want to so thoroughly hurt your body and abuse your mind that you burst into tears and sob and shudder and cry in a puddle at my feet

Brought to Tears

Adam: Do you want to cum?
Avah: Yes sir.
Adam: Why don’t you? Why not just disobey me an cum if you want it? Why do you hold back?

He asked me this Tuesday morning as we chatted online together.

Monday afternoon he had told me I wasn’t to cum until our date Tuesday night. Now, normally this isn’t too big of a deal- I can go a day or two without cumming; easily. Especially these last few months where my libido has been significantly less than usual. Except in basically the past week, it kind of kicked into overdrive. Thus making it harder for me.

And Adam didn’t just tell me not to cum and just leave it alone. No, of course not! He had to tease me and work me up into a horny frenzy. Monday he tortured me with words of how he was going to hold me down by my throat and fuck me; beat me; have me call him sir all night; use me as nothing but a fuck toy- rape me. Needless to say, I was sopping wet and humping my chair by the end of the night. And I still had almost a whole day to wait.

Tuesday morning it got worse- he had me stuff dildos in my pussy and ass and that almost pushed me over the edge. I almost didn’t think I could do it. I was so worked up and so close to cumming, all I would have needed were 30 seconds with my Hitachi. But before I could even give it a second thought Adam had me remove the dildos, once again denying me permission to cum.

So why did I obey?

In earlier years, I would have balked at someone trying to control me (even if it was something I wanted deep down). I either would have never agreed to such conditions or I would have just done as I wished and lied about it. But I’ve grown in the years I’ve been exploring BDSM and my submission.

I’ve learned now that it’s just plain more fun to do as I’m told. It’s entirely more satisfying to be obedient and submissive. Though it’s still so new for me actually. Adam and I agreed that our second date would be much more about my mental submission. I was to call him sir (I like using honorifics, though I draw the line calling someone master if they’re not my master); I was to arrive in lingerie he approved of, a dress, and heels; and my eyes were to be kept downcast that night.

Luckily for me though, I didn’t have to wait until later that night to get off. I had nothing else planned for the rest of the day, so Adam had me come over earlier.

And let me just say ahead of time, never underestimate the hotness of being fucked while still wearing lingerie and heels.

When I got to Adam’s, I immediately stripped out of my dress and kneeled at his feet, offering myself to him, as I was instructed. He pulled out his cock and I started sucking on it briefly before he grabbed me by the hair and pushed me onto the bed face down. My underwear was pulled off and my ass slapped hard a few times before Adam turned me on my back and plunged his fingers into my cunt. I groaned as he hit my g-spot and quickly got me off.

The next few hours went by in a blur. All I remember is a frenzy of sensations- Adam’s hands almost always in my hair or wrapped around my throat. His fingers would pull at the lacey fabric covering my tits and his mouth sought my flesh biting down hard again and again as I screamed and whimpered. I remember him fucking me from behind, my face pushed into the mattress as he held my wrists behind me.

Again- fucking while still wearing some underwear and heels= so.fucking.hot.

It seemed like either his cock or fingers were constantly in my cunt and his teeth biting some piece of exposed flesh.

His words circled my head as he either made me cum or cry out in pain- dirty whore, slut, fuck toy, his to use, hurt and fuck. I was very quickly put into gooey subspace.

At one point he told me to look at him and he spit in my face as he grabbed the sensitive skin on the inside of my thighs. I whimpered and obeyed as he barked at me to keep my legs open.

Then there were the quiet moments with my mouth wrapped around Adam’s cock as he worked at his lap top with the news of the Pope’s landing in the background and being put to some service making the beds and putting dishes in the dishwasher.

Eventually his fiancée, Emma, returned home from work. She was barely in the door before Adam told us to start making out. I think I’ve yet to kiss a girl that wasn’t a good kisser. He then instructed her to finger me as I sucked on his cock. He pinched my nipples hard and I moaned around him. After a little bit he pulled out and started to finger fuck Emma and ordering her to cum. He switched us around a bit and positioned me to be fucked as I ate Emma out. His hands dug into my flesh as he came. I was turned over as the condom was emptied on my face.

“Lick the condom,” he ordered me

I whimpered.

“Stick your tongue out and lick it like the dirty whore you are.”

I obeyed and licked the remaining drops of his cum.

When he was satisfied he told me to go wash up as I was wiping cum from my eyes.

We spent the next while ordering dinner and watching the Mets game. Emma tied me up in a chest harness type fashion and I sat on the floor at Adam’s feet to eat.

“Who are the starting pitchers?”
“Santana, Pelfrey, Perez, Vargas, and Maine,” I responded without a skip. “Wow!” I exclaimed, amazed how I just did that.
“Good girl, I’m training you to think like a submissive. Who’s the best pitcher?”

Crap, I didn’t look at the stats.

“Santana?” I guessed.
“Good girl. Who’s the worst?”
“Um, Pelfrey?”

I really had no idea.

“Who are the 2 new ones?”
“Uh…Perez and Pelfrey? No, wait, Vargas and Perez?”

He sighed and ignored me.

Part way through the game he quizzed me, “Who was Milledge traded for?”
“Shoot, um, Schneider and um…?”
“Think religious,” he said, wrapping his hand in my hair.
“Jesus?”
“Church. Pay better attention slut.”
“Yes sir.’

After dinner I cleared the dishes and wiped down the table then Adam told Emma to attach me to the cross in their bedroom. Emma wrapped a chain around my waist keeping me up against the cross and another chain attached to my rope harness for good measure. Adam came in shortly after and everything after just becomes a blur- I remember a lot of pain. Lol.

Adam had Emma attach clothes pins to my labia and oh God ouch. He told her to try to attach one to my clit or jewelry even. I whimpered in protest, but was ignored. She eventually found my clit though making me holler and dance.

“Ahh! Yellowredgahhhh!!” I screamed in the 2 seconds it was attached before being quickly removed.
“Do you need to be untied?” Adam asked me since I did slip a “red” in there. I’m still amazed my brain was even able to process safewords.

I shook my head no.

After that I danced uncomfortably as I lived with the pinching sensation between my legs as Adam wailed on me and Emma with fists, floggers, and other beating implements.

I continued to complain about the clothes pins and he told me he’d take them off if I asked him to do it with a whip.

I resisted at first.

He teased that they would go watch the Mets game then. I whimpered, just wanting the clothes pins off. I finally gave in and asked for him to take the clothes pins off with the whip.

But fuck I was scared. I was turned around and my hands were chained up because I kept trying to cover my breasts as he flicked the dragon’s tail at them. I screamed as he caught a good hard lick on my chest. He moved on, more interested in my pussy anyways. He landed his first blow higher up, on my mound and I screamed, trying to buckle over, but not being able to go far because of the bondage.

“Sweet Jesus!”

“What’s that slut?” he asked as he came over to comfort me. I leaned my head on his shoulder as I tried to recover. “Are you seeing Jesus? Should we baptize you? Are you wanting to accept Jesus the Savior into your heart?” he teased me.

I shook my head no. What I wanted was for him to not flick that whip near my girly parts again.

“Spread your fucking legs,” he told me as he walked back away.

I stalled at first, shaking.

“Spread them you fucking slut!”

I reluctantly obeyed and tensed up as I waited for the next strike.

He aimed right for my pussy and the tail struck hard, knocking a few pins off. I screamed and started to cry from the intensity of the pain. I shook my head violently crying that I couldn’t when he wanted to do it again.

“Aww look, we made her cry,” he chided me as he came over. His one hand went to my hair as his other pulled the rest of the clothes pins off. My lower lip trembled as I kept a sob locked in the back of my throat. “But she’s holding it back,” he noticed. He slapped my face hard a few times and I started to let the tears go a little, but ultimately keeping it bottled up. I was too embarrassed to weep there tied to the cross as they both watched me.

Our play wound down as he undid me from the cross and had Emma and I get on the bed as he fucked us both to end the night. The rest of the evening was spent cuddled up watching TV quietly before I headed back home.

Weekend Date

I got asked a hard question the other night- when was the last time I didn’t fuck on the first date?

Damn if I didn’t wrack my brain for something!  I came up with last year, when I met Kyle for the 1st time.  But before that?  I know I didn’t always put out so easily when I was 18…

The other hard question I got asked?  Name the 5 starting pitchers of the Mets.  Now, I don’t know all 5 on a good day.  But I can usually pull out Martinez and El Duque .  Except for when I’m chained to a cross and being hit with stuff.

Martinez
El Duque
Santana
Maine
Perez

For future reference.

OMG my body hurt the past few days.  I got thoroughly slapped around.  Yayz.

There’s a large assortment of bite marks all over me- the ones in my back are the worst and go deep into the muscle.  I almost cried after the 3rd bite in the same spot.

That was definitely something that I needed though.

I’m covered in yellow spots now as the bruises are healing.  I hate when the bruises start fading.  Hehe.

God I’m such a masochist.  I love it.

Ok, I’m ready to get beat up again.  (Insatiable too!)

HNT- The Day After

My marks the day after…

(By the way, taking a picture of one’s own back is fairly difficult.)

Not Quite HNT

How about, Holy Fuck Friday?

Marks from my very first single tailing.

I am now a very huge fan.

I <3 Kink

I’m starting to wonder if maybe I like kink just a tiny bit more than sex.

I’m happier to get beaten up without getting fucked then I am to have sex and not get beaten up (at least on a regular basis).

Plus- an orgy with no kink? Meh.

An event, like Dark Odyssey without kink? I’d rather save my money!

I would seriously rather not have sex at Winter Fire then not get beaten up (or beat someone else up as was my mood at camp). Sex I can get anywhere. That’s easy.

But kink? That’s much harder to come by for me. On a good month I may have played twice. And that’s a good month!

A good month of sex is 4 or 5 dates!

Quite disproportionate.

And yet, it’s not as if I don’t fuck guys who are kinky! My circle of friends and playmates is really becoming almost entirely kinky in some form or another.

Ahhh…that’s bliss.

Maybe it’s so disproportionate because I’m slightly picky about who I’ll let top me- and it what kind of ways.

I’m certainly a snob for skill. Skill is way sexy.

Chemistry most definitely plays a factor.

Harry didn’t make the cut because he lacked skill, couldn’t provide the aftercare I needed, and just in general said stupid stuff.

As nice as Denzel is, I don’t actually feel any sexual chemistry between us.

And there are some who I have chemistry with- just not a top/bottom kind of chemistry.

This kind of stuff can get complicated.

Perhaps maybe things are even more complicated by the kind of bottom I’m becoming. I play a lot harder than I did 2 years ago. And I’m only continuing further on that path.

If you had told me a year ago that I would be into piss play and humiliation and even service I would have laughed so hard at you! I would’ve thought you’d lost your mind if you ever even suggested I might try anything that draws blood.

Now, name most things I haven’t done or are slightly scared of I just say to give me some time. Because it really is only a matter of time.

I’m in no rush, and I have no goals about what I want to become.

I’ve already gotten a reputation of being hardcore by some, but I look at others I consider heavy players and even fathom that I’m in the same league as them.

I guess it’s all a matter of perception. The person who deemed me hardcore was fairly vanilla himself.

I think maybe even though I don’t have concrete goals about how I see my path continuing, I do sort of want to be known as heavy player. And not because it’s cool or because it’s better- but it’s because that’s how I see myself playing.

Anytime someone even mentions the word “sensuous,” I turn in the other direction. I don’t want a sensuous top. I don’t want a sensuous scene. I want to be hit, and I want to be hit hard, and I want it until I can’t take it anymore.

Am I being clear enough?

I hope so.