Life, Love, Sex

Hmmm

I really feeling quite enamored with that picture.

I wish I could go back to that night right now.

Cause I would really love another nice beating and some aftercare cuddles.

Mmmmm…aftercare cuddles.  The best kind.

Tattoo Ideas

So a few years ago when I was thinking about tattoos I was thinking how it could be cool to get a tattoo of a single Iris done a la Van Gogh. Though I was never sold enough on the idea to do it.

Though recently I had a new idea along those lines- the same flower, just coloring it differently- not fully colored in, just on the edges. It was kind of inspired by Essin’ Em’s latest tattoo- which I love.

But I dunno where I’d put it. Maybe down the side of my torso on my left side (yes the same side as my cherry blossoms, but I have the right side saved for a possible star/fairy design).

Yes, I got the tattoo bug. It’s been over a year since my last tattoo!

But I might get a piercing first. Even though after the pain of my nose piercing I swore that’d be my last one.

I’m thinking though I might like to try a lip piercing??? I dunno. I feel like I’m going to chicken out. I’m also not entirely sure I’m going to like it on me.

But anyways, I’m procrastinating on this paper that’s due in oh…12 hours…

Let me go at least start that. My name should be a good addition to the blank Word document…

Holy Shit on a Stick!!

I think I’m getting sick again!

My throat is starting to hurt and my nose feels like it’s about to get stuffy.

What the fuck man??!!  I was just sick -twice!!!- in January!!

I do not have the time to get sick right now.

Too.much.school.work.

I am NOT ok with this.

Really- the prospect of being sick really fucking pisses me off.

*Grumble*

The Way I Am

Earlier this week, I camped up at Jefferson’s to recover from my wisdom teeth removal. Although I had been feeling relatively fine the first few days after the procedure, I guess I’d been over doing it with the chewing because by the time I got to Jefferson’s, I was in a good deal of pain- even with the Oxycodon.

Almost immediately after getting there I opted for a long, hot shower- something I don’t have the luxury of at my dorm. That definitely helped me relax.

Jefferson and I spent the evening having dinner and trading music thanks to that cool program, Senuti (which I’ve been telling people about, but no one is as excited about it as I am!). Now both of our music libraries are significantly improved. Way awesome.

The next morning as we ate our ice cream (raspberry sherbert for me actually), Jefferson practically strong-armed me to get the HPV vaccine.

“But I don’t like shots,” I explained.
“Well, do you like cancer?”
“Of course not. But there’s no cervical cancer in my family.”
“You don’t like shots, and you don’t have cancer in the family. Sounds like you’re just making excuses.”
“Yes, I’m quite good at that.”
“Just do it!”
“Oh alright- but I’m not dealing with doctor’s office and their atrocious insurance policy.”
“Just do it.”
“Ok, ok!”

I will soon look into alternative locations to get the shots (I swear!)- starting with my school health center. Do they give that stuff away for free anywhere does anyone know? Or do most insurances cover it?

But anyways, I wanted to share one of my new songs courtesy of Jefferson with you since I found it fitting.

“The Way I Am” by Ingrid Michaelson

Cuz I love you more than I could ever promise.
And you take me the way I am.
You take me the way I am.
You take me the way I am.

Jefferson and I may not have had the most perfect relationship- but here we are still together, just 1 month shy of 2 years. 2 years is by far the longest lasting friendship/relationship of my adult life (yes, my adult life is insanely short. I’m including high school in the mix too). And sometimes I don’t know why he puts up with me- or takes me back every time I break up with him.

(I’m planning on going to one of the classes at Winter Fire on poly and jealousy- for my own sake at least.)

I mean, that really must be freaking love. Right?

Or something. But he definitely takes me the way I am- flaws and everything. And that’s something that’s definitely hard to find.

We Are Not the Armpit of America!

We are more than Newark and Elizabeth with their oil refineries and energy plants!!

We are farmland and beaches and suburbs too!

Malls and diners and jug handles and circles!

Stop making fun of us so much!

Holy Sickness

OMG I’m so sick.  I can’t believe it.  I’m like more sick than my last cold.  I was only really miserable for like an hour with that cold.  Once I took medicine I was a little low on energy, but basically fine.  But this- no, not so much.  Medicine isn’t really making me feel any better.  And I’m so tired- I slept 12 hours last night- right through my morning class even.  And my stuffy nose, and cough, and raspy voice!  Yuck!

Tonight I went out to see my friends at Pleasure Salon, and I’m glad I went- I don’t get to see my friends enough, but God I’m exhausted.

(Also, can I tell you how hot Boymeat looked in his suit?  Oh yeah.)

Callie brought cupcakes and brownies- those yummy mint and ganache brownies that are so good I was willing to break my diet for them.

OMG I can’t tell you how miserable I feel though.

And Oy.  I have these feelings (which are good)…about this…”stuff” (also good), but the feelings are giving me odgeda.  That’s about as much detail I can go into about them.  *Big huge sigh as I contemplate eating comfort food to stuff my icky feelings but will only want to get rid of afterwards because I’m dieting*

Woah, complicated sigh, eh?

Ok, I’m going to take more medicine and go um, do stuff.  I dunno.

I’m really in the mood for some Annie’s Shells and White Chedder.  Crap.  I shouldn’t have had those brownies!

Mac and cheese tomorrow…

Stupid appetite increase right before my period.  Soon I’ll get my period and stop having random cravings, then like will be normal again.

ADD much, Avah?

It’s the cold.  Cut me some slack!

I was going to take pictures tomorrow, but I think I’m going to rest all day because I’m seeing Mika on Saturday then going home for the Superbowl, so I need all the energy I can get!

Ugh.  Wasn’t I ending this like 5 sentences ago?

Blogging

I was rudely awoken this morning, twice, by my roommates. First by darling dear whom I share a room with that was just bustling about in that annoying way when you’re getting ready to leave. So I don’t fault her too much. At least she wasn’t digging in plastic bags. Holy fuck that’s an annoying sound to wake up to!!

Then I was woken up later by my obnoxious ass roommate playing the radio in the hall right next to my door. I hate those roommates. Granted they’re not quite as bad as living with “The Cunt” last year, but they do suck. They take over the bathroom sink in the hall, get makeup and shit everywhere. And their hair. OMG. Everywhere. In huge clumps. It’s disgusting. And they never clean it up! Me or my other roommate invariably end up doing it because we just get so disgusted.

They also never do their dishes in a timely fashion. And I’m not talking just a couple of days. I sometimes leave it for a few days. No, I’m talking a week or more. To the point where it starts to smell. They also have no concept of throwing out the food first before putting the dish in the sink. I’m constantly cleaning out the drain.

Like that one time when I cleaned out Jell-O from it!

Then there’s the fact that they really don’t talk to me and my roommate. Actually, there have been times where they’ve rolled their eyes when we’ve walked in the room. The two of us are pretty sure it’s because we’re white (my other 3 roommates are black). There’s actually a lot of that kind of prejudice on my campus.

But like I said, it’s still better than when I was living with the Cunt last year. She was just insanely unbearable. Right Noelle? Noelle can attest to both the horribleness of The Cunt as well as the black students being prejudiced against the white students at school. (We call it reverse prejudice, but it’s kind of a misnomer isn’t it since prejudice isn’t technically one way.)

Anyways, I’m not writing to complain about my roommates, but having been woken up before I would have liked to have gotten up (that’s a messy sentence), I’m a little cranky. Plus, I think I caught my parent’s colds.

I’m bored. Like the kind of bored where I don’t even want to do anything.

Though I should really make a trip to the art store and pick up some mat board and start selling these photos I worked so hard on last week. They’re really cool. I think you guys will like them. Though, they’re all nature/rural scenes, so I need to work on some city scenes next. I think I need to take a trip in to NYC and take some new pictures because I don’t really love what negatives I have, and I really just can’t print an image I don’t just love.

It’s just so freaking cold though. And I have a hard time justifying the expense of getting into the city (bus or parking, which ever) just to take pictures. I should coordinate it with a TES meeting or hanging out with someone. (I’m still waiting to make plans for getting beat up, Boymeat! Did you get my e-mail?)

I suddenly feel very irrational and emotional, and I ain’t really got a good reason. It’s too early for my monthly “Blue Day” (a day or two right before my period where my mood dips briefly). And in the midst of it, I’ve been having this strange morality crisis. Well, I hate to use the word “morals” because it seems so loaded to me, like it’s intrinsically tied to religion. But that’s not necessarily the case. And I hate to even talk about what it is that I’ve been thinking about because first of all, it doesn’t really even make sense to me. I don’t know where these views are suddenly coming from. And I also don’t want my words to be misconstrued in anyway. And I certainly wouldn’t want to offend someone with my naive/fairy tale 21 year old views on life.

Sometimes though I surprise myself with how conservative my thoughts can be.

Hmm, it could be due to my dieting.  Hunger always did make me emotional and cranky.  But my dieting is paying off.  As of Sunday I had already lost 5 pounds.  So, that’s a start.  And hopefully, by the time warm weather comes around in like April, I’ll be back in my size 10s.  That’d be awesome.

In case you haven’t noticed by now, this is a post of randomness.

I also realized I haven’t mentioned the good news for this summer.  Desire and I are planning a trip in Europe for about a month or so.  We’re really excited and are loving the planning of it.  Especially the trickiness of making initial decisions of what cities we want to see while Jefferson is fucking me.  (I was perfectly coherent until he hit my g-spot, that bastard.)  I went to AAA the other day and got some maps and a European tour book.  I’m really so excited.  And so is my mom, lol.

I have to get my wisdom teeth out soon.  I’m really, really not looking forward to it.  Everyone keeps telling me it’ll be fine, but I really hate when people do that and completely negate my fears.  I’m not nervous about the surgery, I’m anxious about the recovery.  I don’t like being in pain and miserable (in the sick, can’t do anything about it kind of way).  Especially for days on end.  I also found out that my jaw’s going to be weak after the surgery so I have to be on a soft foods diet for like 6 weeks.  It also means I should really refrain from rough sex.  Dude, bummer!  I’m also anxious that I’m going to have some kind of freak accident where I get hit in the face and my jaw breaks.  That would suck.

Shit, I’d be a size 10 in no time though, heh heh.  Totally kidding.

Know what else I should probably not do while my jaw is healing?  Give head.  That seems like undue stress to me.  Aww, poor Jefferson.  No head from me for 6 weeks.  What will he ever do?

Speaking of head, I’ve really grown to dislike getting it.  I had this discussion with Jefferson and Desire the other week.  It’s not really a bash on everyone who’s gone down on me in my life.  No, it’s more like bashing all the bad times, lol.  There’s not much worse than bad head.  Ugh.  Just thinking about it makes me cringe.  Even when it doesn’t suck, I usually end up getting bored after a few minutes.  Really, I’d just rather skip it all together.  Just go right to the fucking.  Or, fingers.  Fingers are good too.

Maybe I should take a nap now…

Happy New Year!

I’m not excited about ending 2007, but rather to see where it leads in 2008!  (Though, let’s just say I’m still iffy about the whole holiday.)

I’m ringing in the new year in DC at a Dark Odyssey play party with lots of camp friends!

More when I return.

*Kisses*

(Be safe out there!)

OMG It’s here!!!!

I’m typing from my new iMac!!!

Total Mac orgasm right now!!!!!!!

It’s so beautiful and awesome and I want to marry it!!!

Huge, Audible, Unbelieveable, Dramatic Gasp!!!

And gigantic, ear peircing, ungodly squeal of delight!!!!!

OH MY GOD!!!!!! 

It’s in NJ!!!!!!!

It’s on the truck for delivery!!!!!!

Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!

OH MY GOD!!!!!!! 

God I’m so excited I could cream myself!!!!!!

Squeal!!!!! 

EEEK!!!!!

Ohmigod, ohmigod, ohmigod, ohmigod!!!

(Somebody had better fucking be here when it comes!!  Maybe it’ll come in the afternoon after my class.  That would be ideal.)

This computer update is brought to you by Apple, Inc. - Yeah it’s freaking exciting.  It’s an Apple.